When will we give a BLEEP about mental health?

I'm not sure that this will be a regular topic on my blog, but I am sure that today, it is most relevant.  I don't watch the news but my sisters texted me last evening about the mass shooting in Lewiston, Maine.  I just read that 22 people are dead and I fear that number may keep rising.  The gunman is on the loose...the only part of this story that isn't all too familiar to us.  We've become that nation of mass shootings.  Gun control, gun laws, all relevant to this discussion but none greater than the issue of mental health.  These shootings are symptomatic!  Guns in the hands of healthy people are not a threat to society.  The problem is, we have a whole nation of unhealthy people.  Robert Card was said to have been checked in at a mental health hospital a month or so ago for hearing voices.  I guess I applaud the fact that he checked in.  I'm not sure if he was forced to or not, but that was more than most do.  

Why?  Because as much as we talk about mental health, we still, as a society, walk around like it isn't as real and threatening as it is.  Tuesday, I told my volunteer team this..."People are walking around, one hair away from cracking.  We are here to love, nurture and encourage, not to be the straw that broke the camel's back."  It is personal and it is professional...I am all too familiar with the detrimental effects of those suffering from mental health issues.  Yet, we still walk around on eggshells, afraid to offend or bear the backlash of confrontation.  As a result, the cycle perpetuates, and we reproduce trauma...passing it from one person to another and down from generation to generation to generation.  

Stress, trauma, genetics, grief, brokenness, life...people are carrying around weights that they can't safely carry.  They are hurting and those around them are hurting as a result.  Families are suffering, individuals are suffering and as a whole, our society is suffering.  Violence, substance abuse, financial troubles, instability, poverty, abuse, broken homes, the list goes on.  Every single issue that I deal with at the center is somehow attached to mental health.  For some, it started during childhood- abuse, neglect, mistreatment, a lack of nurturing and safety.  For others, it was a traumatic event that was never addressed.  Bitterness, anger, pride, pain...they take root and then they shift an individual's entire trajectory.  Their perspective changes.  They view things through a broken lens and then build everything in their lives upon this sinking, stinking foundation.  Self-sabotage.  More trauma.  Sometimes, it feels like we can focus on suicide, but that's not the only death to avoid.  One by one by one by one....burned bridges, broken relationships, burdened loved ones, damaged children, lost jobs, purpose never attained.  Death to dreams.  Death to families.  Death to relationships.  Death to purpose.  It's one step forward, two steps back.  Up, but then down again.  UP and then down again.  UP.  DOWN.  UP. DOWN. Each time, maybe a bit higher and then maybe a bit lower.  Some, walking from disaster to disaster to disaster.  

We pray for change.  We wait for change.  We may even try to call for help, but no one dares to tackle the monkey of mental health.  You know why?  Because it's dangerous.  There's too much risk attached.  It's a sensitive topic that few dare to confront.  I absolutely get it.  Even when you have the courage to address it, you can't change it...only the one who is suffering can make the change.  

This may not resonate with you.  Maybe you haven't been touched or impacted by this killer, but I guarantee there is someone close to you who has.  They may be suffering deeply in silence.  So, to those of you who are suffering...I see you and even though there's a path of destruction behind you, I love you.  You do not have to hide under pride.  You are not alone.  1 in 5 Americans are suffering from mental illness.  I suspect that these numbers reflect those who have addressed their concerns, not the other slew of people who are living in denial. 

​No more reacting...just ACT.  Proactively seek healing. Even if you never admit to others your need for help, admit it to yourself and seek the help that you need.  Life is too short and too fragile to keep living in fear of exposure.  Your suffering is not a sin, but your neglect of it is.  You deserve to reach your potential.  There is a hope and a future for you.  

Depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, bipolar, borderline personality disorder, narcissistic personality disorder, panic disorders, attachment disorders, psychosis, hallucinations, delusions, PTSD- there's no shame until it's too late.  Then, those who suffered in silence, suffer their name sprayed with shame and disgust.  

If you or someone you know displays the symptoms of mental illness, I encourage you to be brave.  I encourage you to take a step toward healing.  Maybe you don't know, because you can't see and dysfunction has become your normal, but you suspect that something may be off...may be wrong.  Take some time to research symptoms, cycles, and the aftermath of mental illness.  If the shoe fits, don't run away.  Call someone you can trust.  Reach out.  Get the help you need.  

Most mental illnesses are triggered by trauma.  Life is hard.  You aren't less of a person because it impacted you...you may have just never had the opportunity or the help needed to heal well.  When bad things happen, you can't just tuck them away and think they'll disappear.  They reappear and when they do, they are uglier and more destructive than before.  

My heart is heavy today because the news set me off.  He "heard voices" telling him to shoot a place up...but he left the hospital and then on another day, picked up a gun and killed dozens of people, multiplied trauma for hundreds more and now, his name will join the others who have worn their mental illness on their sleeves in front of nations.  

Rant over for now, but I'll carry the heaviness of this with me until we start being braver.  Myself included. 

www.pendulumpsych.com
www.safeharbor1.com
www.psychologytoday.com

Also, check out...
www.anitaphillips.com
@kiergaines

​